A person who fainted in the course of an actual life Oval Workplace assembly this week made an ideal springboard for “Saturday Night Live” chilly open this weekend.
“Oh, hi. I didn’t see you there. Someone was dying in my office,” “SNL” resident Donald Trump impersonator James Austin Johnson stated whereas individuals scrambled to assist the fallen man behind him within the scene.
“I think I’m playing this very normal, just stand there and stare like a sociopath. Didn’t even pretend like I was going to help like someone drops something and you do the fake bend.”
Nodding to how Health Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. virtually sprinted from the scene after the person’s collapse, Johnson requested, “And how about RFK? Booked it out of here like someone was trying to give him a vaccine. Brain worm take the wheel! That thing kinda Ratatouille’d him right out of the room.”
He then stepped out from behind the Resolute Desk whereas individuals continued to are inclined to the fallen man and stated, “Each week, I like to create a big visual that sort of sums up how things are going. Last week, it was the demolishing of the East Wing. This week, it’s a medical professional almost dying in my Oval Office at the mere thought of charging less for drugs.”
“Maybe next week a bald eagle will fall dead out of the sky and splat right on the White House lawn,” the imitation Trump smirked. “And by lawn, of course I mean big outdoor concrete floor.”
Ignoring the traditionally lengthy authorities shutdown, the Supreme Courtroom’s skeptical reception to his tariff coverage, the Federal Aviation Administration’s resolution to cut back 1000’s of flights amid a scarcity of air visitors controllers, and the authorized backwards and forwards over meals advantages, the delusional sanguine presidential impersonator referred to as it an “awesome week” — ignoring Democrats’ slate of wins in Tuesday’s elections.
“The Democrats won. The lame stream media called the elections a rebuke of Trump’s policies,” he shrugged. “Jokes on them: They’re Stephen Miller’s policies. I don’t read that stuff. No like-y read-y.”
Johnson celebrated just a few different small wins for the White Home, noting, “The Supreme Court said we could stop feeding poor people. You can clap for that, SNAP!”
Ever the problem-solver, the fake president addressed all-around hikes in meals costs, that are 3% increased than the identical time final 12 months, in response to the Shopper Value Index.
“People are saying, ‘But sir, how will I afford my Thanksgiving turkey for my family?’” he stated. “Well, good news is your family’s not coming because all the planes are gone.”
Summing up his technique, Johnson instructed everybody, “We call that problems solving problems. Killing two birds with another bird, now you got a bunch of crazy birds.”
You may watch the total sketch proper right here:
