Advancing age and the accompanying decline in psychological acuity and bodily energy have been mentioned quite a bit these days — particularly when the 2024 presidential election featured two of the oldest candidates in historical past till President Joe Biden withdrew his candidacy in July.
Nevertheless, many senior residents are main energetic and productive lives. I’m 84 years previous and in good well being, each mentally and bodily. I can’t say for sure why I’m in such good condition, however I attribute it to sure routines I’ve adopted over time.
I’ve stayed fairly self-sufficient and don’t like folks prejudging what I can and can’t do due to my age. A number of years in the past, after I was in my late 70s, my daughter’s childhood buddy visited us together with her husband. In the future, we wanted to take one thing down from a excessive shelf. I walked to the storage and introduced out a stepladder. The husband instantly reacted as if I had completed one thing unsuitable.
“Uncle,” he mentioned, “you should not be doing this at your age.” I informed him I used to be completely succesful, however he proceeded to take the ladder from me and get the merchandise.
Two Decembers in the past, a younger relative stayed with us for a number of days. One morning, I made tea and introduced it to her at our breakfast desk.
“What is this?” she mentioned. “You sit. I will make breakfast.”
I informed her that I make breakfast daily. I’ve been doing this and different family chores for years. I’m not going to cease simply because I get previous.
Right here’s my tackle dwelling a passable and lengthy, wholesome life. I’m not, by any means, an knowledgeable on something — these are my ideas primarily based on how I’m dwelling my life and why I feel it’s serving to me.
1. Don’t procrastinate on doing what you wish to do.
My spouse and I’ve all the time made time to trip in several elements of the world, give attention to hobbies and study new expertise.
In simply the previous 18 months, we witnessed the glory of lavender fields in full bloom in France, ziplined in Costa Rica and cruised alongside the Chilean Fjords to Argentina. In earlier travels, we visited a lot of Western Europe, virtually all of South America, plus South Africa and Zambia. We’ve got visited the ends of the three continents — Kanyakumari in India, Cape of Good Hope in Africa and Cape Horn in South America. We’ve got seen Niagara Falls, Victoria Falls and just lately, Iguazu Falls. Our bucket listing has reached all-time low. If one thing pops up sooner or later, we are going to take the chance. However we really feel fulfilled.
Once I posted a few of our journey images, one among my nephews mentioned, “Uncle, I am impressed by your enthusiasm, curiosity, and energy in traveling to all these wonderful places at your age. You are an octogenarian nomad.”
Our lives have been enriched by all this journey. We met attention-grabbing people who find themselves gardeners, artists, guide lovers and foodies, identical to us. We made long-lasting friendships. I can’t think about what my life can be if I simply stayed put.
2. Love, belief and assist your vital different.
In July, my spouse Bharati and I celebrated our 54th wedding ceremony anniversary. After dwelling so a few years collectively, I’ve realized how love and appreciation develop due to shared experiences. Having been collectively for over half a century, by thick and skinny, I take into consideration the which means and significance of our wedding ceremony vows.
We’re each Hindus. Within the Vedic wedding ceremony ceremony, there’s a ritual of Saptapadi (seven steps round a fireplace, for the hearth god) throughout which we made vows much like “for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part.”
Trying again, I’m wondering how we survived our preliminary years after we had been married, once we confronted lengthy odds. After our wedding ceremony, Bharati needed to keep again in India after I returned to America. It took her one 12 months to get her visa because of India’s authorities paperwork. After she arrived within the U.S., she needed to acclimate to a brand new nation far totally different from the place she had lived.
All newlyweds have challenges when beginning a brand new life collectively, however ours had been exacerbated by the financial local weather within the early Seventies. I graduated with a grasp’s diploma in engineering from the College of Oklahoma. On the time, the nation was within the grip of a extreme recession. Massive corporations had been shedding folks. It took me greater than two years to achieve footing in a very good job.
Our earnings had been meager throughout this era, however we nonetheless loved our life. Within the following years, we suffered the lack of our first youngster to spina bifida and two tough pregnancies a number of years later. We recovered from all of this and had a fairly profitable middle-class life. I realized that when two folks love, belief and assist one another, issues are inclined to work out.
3. Modify your life-style as your physique adjustments.
Our our bodies change as we grow old, and we have to regulate. Don’t dwell in denial. We’ve got to take heed to our our bodies in addition to to medical doctors. When you’ve got an issue with listening to, get a listening to assist. When you’ve got an issue with stability, get a cane. I’ve one which converts to a chair so I can sit when I’m uninterested in standing.
After doing chores for over 40 years, I now keep away from doing stuff which will trigger bodily hurt, corresponding to shoveling snow or mowing the garden. I’m extraordinarily cautious to keep away from falls. After attending a daily yoga class for years, I’ve switched to chair yoga. I now use a recumbent bike as a substitute of a daily one. And there may be one new factor I’ve began doing that I by no means did in my youthful years: I take a day nap.
Throughout our many travels, we got here throughout many individuals utilizing canes, walkers and wheelchairs who had been ready to participate in outside excursions. Their ageing our bodies didn’t cease them from having fun with their trip.
4. Maintain busy and intellectually occupied.
One of many challenges of retired life is staying occupied. Research have proven that mentally stimulating work helps stave off dementia. That is sensible to me. There’s loads of time to fill. You possibly can solely watch a lot TV. It’s a must to discover issues that problem your mind.
Simply earlier than I retired in my early 70s, I began studying Spanish. It’s my fourth language after Hindi, Marathi and English.
I watch Spanish telenovelas, and each Saturday, I attend a Zoom meetup group to observe talking (I could make small speak). I come throughout new phrases throughout these conferences, however I quickly overlook them. It’s like remembering the names of strangers at events.
“The inability to retrieve names, even those we know well, is a common complaint of aging,” a current article in The Washington Put up famous, including that forgetfulness by itself will not be an indication of cognitive points.
I spend at the very least a few hours, Monday by Friday, engaged in writing-related actions: a brand new weblog, brainstorming subjects for a brand new piece, researching alternatives to publish. I’ve revealed a novel and have completed a second manuscript.
5. Make daily as productive as doable.
Folks typically say I look youthful than I’m. I haven’t completed something particular to realize this feat. I’m an abnormal man dwelling an abnormal life, however I’ve created a selected construction to my life.
You would possibly say my days are like these of Invoice Murray within the film “Groundhog Day”: I stand up, learn the paper, train, take an after-lunch nap, write for a few hours, after which spend my evening studying books (principally fiction) and magazines like Author’s Digest, Poets & Writers, and the New Yorker whereas watching TV. It’s nothing too extraordinary, however I’ve been constant.
I’ve by no means adopted any weight loss plan. I eat and drink what I would like, moderately. I’ve been principally a vegetarian, though we sometimes eat poultry and seafood, however by no means crimson meat. I’ve by no means smoked, regardless of the temptation.
For numerous years, I did the quarter-hour of every day train beneficial by the Royal Canadian Air Power. This consisted of solar salutes, push-ups, squats, and in-place jogging. I labored in an workplace for 40 years and I made some extent of taking a stroll daily at lunch — even when it was freezing chilly exterior. My colleagues would ask, “Did you do your daily constitutional walk even today?” After retirement, I joined a gymnasium to proceed my train routine.
I haven’t performed any demanding sports activities or participated in marathons that resulted in harm or long-term well being points. That is under no circumstances a criticism of those that do this stuff. I love them. Nevertheless, on the finish of every day, I’m content material to have completed one thing helpful. Maybe this self-discipline has contributed to my being within the good condition that I’m. I settle for the truth that typically sickness comes with out discover and for no motive. I suppose I’ve been fortunate as properly.
6. Hang around with your folks.
Final 12 months, Dr. Vivek Murthy launched a brand new surgeon basic advisory calling consideration to the general public well being disaster of loneliness, isolation and lack of connection in our nation. It doesn’t need to be that method — and it doesn’t take a lot to fight it. Connection may be small speak with folks we meet in a library, in an train class, or making a fast name to a buddy or relative.
Making new pals and having a social circle has been nice for my well-being. I met a number of good folks after I managed the Northern Virginia Writers Guild in my 70s. And I made pals with individuals who attend my Spanish-speaking meetup group. We invite them to our home for brunch on occasion.
My spouse’s outgoing persona has helped us make pals in our neighborhood, too. We’re a part of a foodie group that goes out for lunch each month or so. Generally we meet our pals for pleased hour. A few of our pals have been in our lives for over 40 years. A lot of them have grow to be like our prolonged household; we rejoice with them on joyous events and lean on them in instances of bother.
7. Don’t let battle get to you.
All through our lives, we come throughout many various folks, together with mother and father, siblings, pals, neighbors, work colleagues and vital others, and tensions can come up when our views battle with others. Disagreements may be triggered by absolutely anything — from what to eat for dinner or what film to observe to (in fact) politics — and it’s typically exhausting to come back to a consensus.
So, how will we preserve a very good relationship over a protracted interval? As Audrey Hepburn as soon as mentioned, “Happiness is health and a short memory!” What’s the usage of holding a grudge? Simply overlook it and go on along with your life. In case you don’t like what somebody, together with your partner, says, you possibly can have a cordial dialogue as a substitute of getting mad and throwing tantrums. Finally, relationships are a two-way road: We will’t management how one other particular person behaves, we will solely management our habits.
The place do I am going from right here? I’ll maintain dwelling the best way I now do. I fear about getting a prolonged sickness as a result of I don’t wish to be a burden to anybody. If my finish has to come back, let it come quick.
Generally I additionally fear concerning the security of our youngsters and grandchildren as a result of there are such a lot of loopy issues occurring world wide daily. Nevertheless, you possibly can’t dwell in a relentless state of concern. If one thing occurs, cope with it then. Get pleasure from your life as a lot as you possibly can. That’s not a secret system — it simply helps to say it out loud each every so often.
Ashok Shenolikar is a novelist, short-story author, and essayist primarily based in Ellicott Metropolis, Maryland. A retired engineer, his writing may be learn on his weblog, ashokshenolikar.com. His essays have been revealed in The Academy of Coronary heart and Thoughts, The Pilcrow & Dagger and India Overseas. He managed the Northern Virginia Author’s Guild Meetup from 2013 by 2019. His novel “Decisions They Made” is offered in paperback and Kindle variations.
Do you may have a compelling private story you’d prefer to see revealed on HuffPost? Discover out what we’re in search of right here and ship us a pitch at pitch@huffpost.com.