“Saturday Night Live” kicked off this weekend’s episode with a sketch exhibiting a pill-addled President Donald Trump holding an anything-goes press convention on Air Pressure One.
Within the skit, press secretary Karoline Leavitt (performed by Ashley Padilla) braced herself for chaos as she instructed reporters, “I know you have questions for the president, but it’s very late, he’s exhausted. His brain is all over the place. So unfortunately, he can’t wait to talk to you.”
“SNL” resident POTUS impersonator James Austin Johnson then peeked his head out from behind the curtains and introduced, “I’m ready to talk, and you know, this is exciting. Tonight I took both an Ambien and an Adderall, so we’re gonna see which one wins.”
However earlier than taking questions, the fake Trump couldn’t assist himself from fawning over his press secretary, as he’s develop into inclined to do quite a lot of occasions in actual life just lately.
“How great is Karoline Leavitt. We love her. Oh, she’s got a beautiful face and those lips that don’t quit,” Johnson fawned because the digital camera panned in to Padilla’s face. “It’s pretty amazing that I can just openly simp over my young blonde subordinate.”
“Can we get a close-up? People need to see this. Look at those lips,” the president mentioned. “They go ‘bop, bop, bop’ like a machine gun. She liked it because I’m very nice to women.”
However simply an instantaneous later, Johnson pointed to CNN’s Kaitlan Collins and mentioned, “Yes, you have a question, you nasty, horrible witch.”
Barely entertaining her ask about affordability, he subsequent addressed the escalating scenario at Venezuela and the oil tanker that was seized within the Caribbean on Wednesday.
“Yes, we’re doing pirate now. Argh!” Trump mentioned, earlier than rolling “declassified video” of a suspected drug-trafficker being struck whereas hovering by the sky in a reindeer-led sleigh.
“Was that Santa?” a bewildered reporter requested.
“Not anymore,” Trump beamed.
Subsequent on the agenda have been just lately launched images from Jeffrey Epstein’s property, which included the president.
“Look, the fact is, these photos are fake news. A Democrat hoax,” he rebuffed.
“Even the picture of a bowl of condoms with your face on them, and the text saying ‘I’m huge’?” the reporter pressed.
Unable to move on a chance to boast, “They’re 100% legit. I love those files. I’m in the files! I took a lot of great pictures.”
At that time, Padilla’s Leavitt knew it was time to close issues down, however the fake president needed to get in a single final phrase.
“I have to begin my pre-bedtime self-care ritual, putting a bandage on my hand and covering it with makeup, then adding more layers of bandage and makeup,” he defined. “It’s a medical lasagna. Mamma mia!”
“We should all be very worried about my health, I’m very ill, then I will brush my teeth before drifting off and dream about Karoline’s mouth.”
Watch the total sketch right here:
